The Genesis of Success - Being Secure

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I strongly believe that before you see success, you have to believe in your ability to accomplish that which you deem successful. Having faith in your abilities starts with being secure. When you are sure of your worth and value, success is inevitable. What does it mean to be secure vs. insecure to you?

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My definition,

as found on this lovely t-shirt available at shopcartiayreshay.com #shamelessplug states:

 

Certain of self-worth and purpose; unshaken by life’s disturbances; free from fear or anxiety. Confident and assured that she can do anything. 

The secure woman knows that she has value. She is grounded. Life brings plenty of uncertainty and blows, but the secure woman (although sometimes difficult) pushes past internal and external struggles like a boss. She may have insecure moments, but she pulls it together quickly to live out her calling.  

I developed the SECURE athleisure line before Issa Rae's hit show insecure launched on HBO, but after hearing so much about the series, I had to watch it. This show has some of the most amazing writing and storytelling, so I can't wait for season three! In the show, Issa Dee (Issa Rae) struggles to navigate the tricky professional and personal terrain of Los Angeles along with her best friend Molly (Yvonne Orji). insecure chronicles their journeys and made me think about how being secure plays a major role in life, relationships, work, and overall success. 

YOU MIGHT BE INSECURE IF: 

  • You knowingly tolerate disrespect and allow it to continue.
  • You smother others out of fear that something will go wrong. Security trusts, believes, and isn’t fretting about what may or may not happen. 
  • You engage in negative self-speak. Affirmations (think Ryan Pierce in the Girls Trip movie) are a sure way to help you calm down in the moment, regain your focus, and celebrate who and whose you are. 

YOU’RE NOT INSECURE IF: 

  • You want your mate to be your #1 fan. I had a conversation with a friend in a new relationship who was concerned because her partner did not compliment her, hardly ever. Whether you're Beyonce or not, your partner needs to think you're bomb and that nobody can do it better than you. All women want that, and it doesn't make you insecure. 
  • You speak up about what you want and don't want. Women know. We have this innate thing that tells us when a chick is a little too interested (hoe-dar), or if the energy is off with a friend. Feeling others' wrong motives, speaking up, or adjusting accordingly doesn't make you insecure. 
  • You have an off moment. We are human. We make mistakes, we fail and we fall. Having a down moment or unconfident day doesn't make you insecure as a whole. Staying there does. 

So what do you think? What makes a person secure or insecure?